Confidence—Delphine Back (Flickr.com)

Owing to the great importance associated with confidence, many people normally ask, “What is confidence?”  Well, this is an important question because a person truly needs this quality in life in order to succeed.  As someone tries to answer the above question, it is important to note that confidence is not something that can be quantified or defined easily, but there are some words which could be used to help understand the question, “what is confidence?”

What is confidence and how is it developed?

Normally, confidence in life is determined by a number of factors that are evident in day-to-day living.  These include:

• A person’s identity
• A person’s level of success
• A person’s sense of worth

As people talk about these three factors, it is important to know that these factors cannot be separated because they are all dependent on each other in the enjoyment of abundant life.  It is however, important to note that a person’s self esteem is affected by how a person feels about their identity or sense of belonging, as well as a person’s level of success.  When asking “what is confidence?” therefore, it will be hard to answer that without looking at these different aspects of life.

Confidence can be said to be an attitude that determines a person’s perspective towards their own self and towards life.  This means that a person can look at their abilities and appreciate them and also appreciate themselves for who they are.  If you wonder “what is confidence?” you should be able to look at these aspects in life and understand whether you are a person who is fully confident about yourself or if you suffer from low self-esteem.

With that simple idea on what is confidence, the question is, how is it identified?

Every quality in a person’s life is reflected by some outward behaviours or an inner aspect which is easily noticed.  With this being said, it is important to note that confidence is understood by the way a person views life and other things surrounding them, as well as their response to these things.  Some of the traits of confidence include assertiveness, passion, high self-belief, trust, optimism, and developed emotional stability.  If anyone asked you what is confidence? You would be able to use some of these traits to explain to them or even help them understand if they are confident.

How is self confidence developed?

Normally, our confidence is either learned early in life and as we grow up, depending with the circumstances we go through.  A parent is in a great position to build self confidence in a child early in life by speaking positively instead of resulting to criticism.  But the question is, how many parents can answer the question what is confidence?  How many understand how to build confidence in their children?  Seeing that many parents also grew up without much affirmation, building in their children what they don’t have is always hard if not impossible.  It is however, important to not only seek the answer to what is confidence, but also to develop it by associating with people who are positive about life, and also by reading books on self development.

Life coaching or personal coaching as it is otherwise referred to is one of the greatest ideas that has been discovered for development and learning. This aspect of development has a number of benefits and has been known to be a successful way for improving performance and productivity in life. Many people who have embraced life coaching can tell of its benefits, either in their career and direction, or even in their fulfillment as far as their personal life is concerned.  This has also become a great source of satisfaction for many people.

The growing popularity for life coaching

Participation in life coaching can be a defining thing in your life. The exercise has a host of advantages that one can get from this experience, especially when dealing with a qualified coach. Many companies today have been able to soar in their success as a result of this kind of experience, especially when dealing with their work force. It is with no doubt one of the mostly embraced exercises nowadays, as people seek to rise in confidence and self-esteem. Personal coaching is helpful in making goals for life and achieving them, while at the same time leading a relaxed life.

Advantages of life coaching include

• Being able to manage transitions in your life.
• The enhancement of leadership skills.
• Increased productivity in your career or business.
• Building self-esteem and self-confidence.
• Enhancement of communication skills
• Boosting your inter-relational skills.
• Growing as a better mentor and even being able to offer life coaching services yourself, among other things.

How to get the best life coaching professional

It is important to understand that not everyone can become a good life coach and therefore you must look at a number of qualities that are important in life coaching. It is essential to understand the qualities of a good life coach if you do not know them and this can lead to frustration both on the person being coached and the one seeking to offer the coaching experience. Below are some of the things that one should look for in one suitable to offer life coaching services;

• To begin with, life coaching is all about inspiring and not imposing. You should therefore look at one who is able to motivate you rather than try to force things down your throat. Life coaching has to do with drawing the potential that is hidden within you and not trying to introduce knowledge and other things from without.
• A life coach is a great motivator rather than an imposer. Life coaching has to do with developing what is within you tactically and with patience until you reach the desired place in life.
• A life coach should also be able to reproduce what is within the person they are coaching rather than direct things. This is something that is easily identifiable in those people who are successful in life coaching and should not be ignored.
• Life coaching is only effective when approached as facilitation for change, since it helps to empower or enable the people being coached rather that instruct them.

Life coaching is a great tool that can help in the fulfillment of life’s dreams if approached properly. Finding a person who is able to motivate patiently is always a great plus as this is what personal coaching is all about. There are many life coaching providers online and connecting with a genuine one can transform your life

Dealing with matters of self-esteem is never easy, yet it is one of the most important aspects in life for a healthy living. It is easy to try and motivate others while living in a cocoon of worthlessness on your part. There are various self-esteem activities which are known for their effectiveness in boosting people’s self-esteem. It is important to understand that productivity and a fulfilled life always begin with the ability to love and appreciate one-self in order to have the charisma required for facing life successfully.  Many corporate companies have come to appreciate the role played by the many self-esteem activities and have been investing to help their staff members to build balanced self-esteem for better results at work. Various self-esteem activities have varying results depending on the extent of the low self-esteem in someone.

Useful self-esteem activities

Anyone can boost their self-esteem by being involved in some useful self-esteem activities with the right kind of company. Below are some of the activities that could help in dealing with low self-esteem:

• Stay around people who speak positively about you and your efforts. Many people suffering from low self-esteem are always surrounded by people who view life negatively all the time. This definitely will affect your mind if you are not careful. Surrounding yourself with people who are positive about you and about life can be one of the strongest self-esteem activities that you can initiate in order to deal with the negative attitude towards yourself and towards life.
• Not being too harsh on yourself in case of a failure is one of the most powerful self-esteem activities to consider. Many people normally think of themselves so highly that they cannot stomach a mistake or believe that they are the ones who have failed. Look at failure as a stepping stone to greater things and learn from it.

Self-esteem activities that involve other people’s help

• Getting a life coach who can help motivate you and get the best out of you is one of the greatest and notable self-esteem activities. Many people who have embraced personal coaching have been able to boost their self-esteem.
• People in marriage can also help in boosting each other’s self-esteem by the way they handle each other. It has been noted that sex is one of the best self-esteem activities for married people, especially when done in the right atmosphere. It is however important to note that sex outside marriage can lead to a poor self worth after some time and therefore should be avoided.
• Other self-esteem activities which can be practiced by parents, teachers and employers include speaking positively to and about your juniors’ positive actions and avoiding unnecessary criticism. Telling a child something like, “well done”, “thank you”, “you can make it” and such will help boost their self-esteem. Companies can also offer incentives to their staff members as a way of boosting their morale and building self-esteem.

Is it possible to have a stress free life?

By sun dazed from Flickr.com

Stress is everywhere and it is part of everyday living. One may say that he or she can never live a single stress free day. A single situation, unexpected problems and people we meet every day could become an ultimate stressor. The question is how do we accomplish stress relief approaches? Is it possible to have a stress free life?

You hold the key to a successful stress relief journey

An optimist may see things in a positive way; for every problem, he or she may look at it as a challenge. With this, any stressor will never be successful in making this person problematic or stressed. This could be an example of stress free living. An individual ought to know that stress varies with each person because it is how we see things, how we handle situations and how we cope with them. Stress relief techniques are not impossible to learn as long as you know that you can achieve them. You can either change the situation or change your reaction.

Stress relief ways are easy to learn

There are plenty of stress relief ways to manage and cope with different sources of stress. Since everyone has a unique reaction to stress, there is no singular solution to coping with it. You must first make an assessment of yourself; what are the habits, attitudes or maybe certain behaviours that alter your stress free life? What is the common situation that causes you to be problematic could ruin your day or could turn happiness into sadness?

Avoid dealing with unnecessary stress: one of the most effective stress relief ways

We can never say that all stress can be avoided, but you may be surprised that most of these stressors could be eliminated without the need of addressing it. It is up to you to say “no” to some of these things. Again, assess what you need to face and those that are only decorations.

Same with situations; a person can also avoid people that stress them out. If someone is constantly giving you stress, then reduce the time you spend with that person or end the relationship that you have for good.

Environmental factors can also produce stress; we could achieve stress relief through avoidance. Although it is beyond our control, we could still finds means to counter this stress effectively.

Self-esteem is what an individual views and perceives about his or her self. If you have high self-esteem which implies that you are confident with yourself, the outcome would be your disposition in life is somewhat positive and prevailing, thus impacting how you relate to others. Having low self-esteem is not good and the complete opposite of the first one, hence social capabilities are also greatly affected. This is one important area to dwell on with relation to self-development.

Focusing much attention on self-esteem is very critical, for it is believed to be the root or cause for a person to limit his or her ability to do things, interact with other people and achieve total happiness. An individual with low self-esteem doesn’t see good things about himself; he is not glad to be who he is. The core of self-development would teach us how to achieve satisfaction with oneself.

Positive thinking to attain self-development and lift self-esteem

When asked to describe yourself, are you often ashamed and mostly have nothing to say? That would be the case if you do not know yourself well and you are focused on your weaknesses instead of your strengths and good points. When you look in the mirror, you will see a unique and wonderful creation. You have good features that you might not notice or just need to be revealed and enhanced.

Your low self-esteem pushes you to think of negative things about yourself, wherein you can see nothing but flaws; disregarding the big picture and only seeing a small dot. You can do a simple routine every morning when you wake up. Face the mirror and say: “I am beautiful. I’m strong. I can do it!” This is not a spell, nor will a miracle happen, but it will definitely affect your mood for the day. Remember, it’s all in the mind. When you think positive, the confidence level will increase and you will feel happy about yourself.

Self-development implies working on your weaknesses to boost low self-esteem

Everyone has weaknesses; no one is perfect, and this only signifies the basis of being a human. However, this might somehow affect your self-esteem in a way that it will affect how you act, how you think and how you socialise if you don’t know how to handle and counter efficiently.

You might not be aware that these weaknesses could change and bring something good to you. For instance, the criticisms from other people; you may strengthen your low self-esteem when you can handle it and know constructive criticisms may build you up and damaging criticisms may somehow push you to do better; you are not that person they are making you believe you are, hence you are leading your way into righteous self-development.

By Scootie from Flickr.com

Each person is unique and the level of happiness as well as depression will vary. The reason behind this is that there are external factors that may affect our emotions and feelings towards something, like people that surround us, unexpected situations and any circumstances that we may encounter. Sadness is a feeling, it is quite normal in human nature; when it comes to depression, it is a different story. There are several varieties of self-help for depression as it is a prolonged state of sorrow and if not managed properly, may bring unhealthy and negative outcomes that may affect self-development.

Self-help for depression will give way to ultimate self-development

Are you aware, what we think and feel has great impact on our physical body? There are also psychological effects. You may be experiencing stress, negative feelings and most of all depression or anxiety if it is prolonged; it is unhealthy for your body and might transpire into illnesses. Therefore, we should be careful, not only with our physical being but also learning self-help for depression. We need to avoid direct stressors, substances or any situation that will trigger our emotions in a negative way, because again, it is not helpful to deal with them. Both mind and body should be healthy, which if maintained and managed well will lead to proper self-development.

Identifying the root cause, self-help for depression and self-development

Depression is not an unknown state of one’s feelings. There are experiences and circumstances in life that may be the root cause. Self-help for depression will aid you in dealing with the cycle of your behaviour, a continuous pattern that you may not like but may identify those causes. You can never get away from depression and you cannot achieve fulfillment for self-development as long as this issue is unresolved. It is similar to curing a wound when you don’t have any idea of where it is.

Time heals all wounds, a self-help for depression

When a person is depressed, he or she would not be able to eat properly, have enough sleep, would not be able to work efficiently. Bottom line is he or she is not in the mood to do anything, even extremely fun activities. You should know that the mind, emotions, as well as the body are occupied by a dark cloud. But as the saying goes, “Time heals all wounds”. Depression might be a prolonged sadness but it definitely has an end. To stop the cycle, you must be equipped with ways in how to handle and counter negative situations; an aspect of self-development.

By Handolio from Flickr.com

There are certain stages in life where an individual will go through various changes to be able to achieve growth and self-development. This is a natural process, a continuous pattern as we age. Self-improvement is a different area to dwell in; it is not an immediate aspect of natural self-development. A person can make a decision as to whether he or she would undergo this procedure. There would be a definite time where self-improvement is crucial for a man’s life to meet distinct criteria for social, emotional, spiritual, physical as well as mental enhancement.

First stage of Self-improvement: A cocoon

Are you often being isolated from the crowd? Are you hiding and hesitant to reveal yourself to people? It is time for you to step out of your shell; a good start for you to reach proper self-development. Social aspect is very significant, thus we need others as no man is an island. Knowing and understanding yourself first is what will trigger your way to effective communication and interaction; hence, you need to improve this area. Assess what you need to change, negative qualities for example; by reducing them in order to meet social norms.

Second stage of Self-improvement: From a caterpillar to begin with self-development

Are you a person that has been tagged with a name ‘ugly duckling’? Do you often feel that you are just like a caterpillar who anticipates the right period for you to bloom into a beautiful butterfly? Every individual is unique and has his or her own qualities, starting with one’s physical attributes. All of us undergo the stage of being a caterpillar and it is up to you if you want to stay that way for the rest of your life. You must be aware that you can make a change. Acceptance is the key, rather than comparing yourself to others. You are already beautiful, you just need to somehow enhance and reveal the beauty within you. The core of self-improvement is that when you feel good about yourself, it comes out naturally, which is also the foundation of self-development.

Final stage of Self-improvement: Becoming a butterfly

Every one of us aspires to reach the ultimate goal of becoming the best we can ever be. But this doesn’t transpire overnight; it will take a lot of time and effort for prevailing results. It is not enough to focus on your appearance alone, which is what others will first see in you, nor establishing your solid social capabilities but depriving your spiritual growth. There should be a balance and holistic maturity to achieve successful self-development.

Self-improvement is a continuous practice. You must remember that becoming a butterfly, one must be kept in a cocoon and come out as a caterpillar first.

Analysing motivation through interests, a self-help assessment

Interests could classify what we are as a person; an instrument to attain our goals and ambitions, as well as in decision making. From critical thinking like when choosing a course in college, to selecting a dress to be worn for the day, interests will often be the basis. If you know what you want to do, your inclination, that will add up to your drive thus becoming a motivating factor for you to act and keep on going. Knowing this, you may obtain personal growth; an individual who aspires and dreams, focuses and works hard for it is a good sign for self-help improvement.

Priorities check, a motivating fuel for personal growth

Setting priorities in life is a good practise. This will serve as your guide as you go along; it greatly affects your attitude towards what you do. It is same with planning ahead and being conscious of your limitations and is somewhat healthy and could be a measurement for personal growth and reducing self-help risk.  Let’s say your priority is work, motivating yourself to put effort and spend your day working will constantly increase.

Mood as a motivating factor

If you woke up one day and you felt that you are not in the mood to do certain things, your motivation to act is affected. Also, when you are happy, enthusiastic, and eager to start your day, you are instantly doing things even beyond your capabilities.

In attaining personal growth, you need that push and drive to keep you going and striving for your utmost potential. Several self-help facets deal with this aspect for they tell an individual to never give up on anything, thus strengthening a person.

• If life hands you lemons, make lemonade.
• It happens.
• Always do your best. What you plant now, you will harvest later. – Og Mandino
• Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy. – Norman Vincent Peale
• If you are not doing good with what little you have, depend upon it the more money you get the more selfish you would become…If your real desire is to do good, there is no need to wait for money before you do it. –James Allen
• It’s never too late to be what you might have been – George Eliot
• Nothing is impossible. The word itself says “I’m possible.” – Audrey Hepburn
• Your time is limited. Don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma, which is living the result of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other people’s opinion drown your inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary. – Steve Jobs
• Change your thoughts and you change your world. – Norman Vincent Peale
• Do everything without a second chance in mind.
• There isn’t a person anywhere who isn’t capable of doing more than he thinks he can.- Henry Ford
• Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I’m not there, I go to work. – Robert Orben
• I am thankful to all those who said NO to me. It’s because of them I did it myself.
  - Albert Einstein
• If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.- Dr. Wayne Dyer
• It always seems impossible until it’s done. – Nelson Mandela

Motivational Quotes To Lift You Up…

• Someone’s opinion of you does not have to become your reality. – Les Brown
• Pleasure in the job puts perfection in the work. – Aristotle
• When I thought I couldn’t go on, I forced myself to keep going. My success is based on persistence, not luck. – Estee Lauder
• In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure. Bill Cosby
• If you hear destructive criticisms, listen to some good music.
• Everyone who became champions played the game as best as they could.
• The pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. – Winston Churchill
• Don’t be afraid to give up the good to go for the great. – John D. Rockefeller
• Limitations are challenges, not stoppages.
• Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law. – Voltaire J J J
• I wanted to be successful, not famous. George Harrison
• I turned down a scholarship to Yale. The problem with college is that there’s a tendency to mistake preparation for productivity. You can prepare all you want, but if you never roll the dice you’ll never be successful. – Shia LaBeouf
• I didn’t see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life. – Steve Jobs
• I like to think that I’ve been a good manager. That fact has been very instrumental in making Linux a successful product. – Linus Torvalds
• Success follows doing what you want to do. There is no other way to be successful. – Malcolm Forbes

Motivational Quotes For You To Beat The Odds…

• When you feel like giving up, remember why you held on for so long in the first place. –Anonymous
• Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan “press on” has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race. – Calvin Coolidge
• We can do anything we want to do if we stick to it long enough. – Helen Keller
• Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time. – Thomas A. Edison
• One man has enthusiasm for 30 minutes, another for 30 days, but it is the man who has it for 30 years who makes a success of his life. – Edward B. Butler
• Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something, and that this thing, at whatever cost, must be attained. – Marie Curie
• Instead of giving myself reasons why I can’t, I give myself reasons why I can. – Unknown
• Everyone has inside them a piece of good news. The good news is you don’t know how great you can be! How much you can love! What you can accomplish! And what your potential is. – Anne Frank
• People become really quite remarkable when they start thinking that they can do things. When they believe in themselves they have the first secret of success – Norman Vincent Peale
• Keep away from small people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great. – Mark Twain
• If you have the courage to begin, you have the courage to succeed. – David Viscott
• Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, the mind can achieve. – Napoleon Hill
• Our imagination is the only limit to what we can hope to have in the future. – Charles F. Kettering
• Men’s best successes come after their disappointments. – Henry Ward Beecher
• Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Willing is not enough; we must do. – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
• Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm. – Ralph Waldo Emerson
• Big shots are only little shots who keep shooting. – Christopher Morley
• Success in life is a matter not so much of talent or opportunity as of concentration and perseverance. – C.W. Wendte
• If my mind can conceive it, and my heart can believe it, I know I can achieve it. – Jesse Jackson
• Pain is temporary. It may last a minute, or an hour, or a day, or a year, but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it lasts forever. – Lance Armstrong

The search for happiness is one of the most important missions that a person embarks on.  For some people, happiness means being healthy, being beautiful, having a wonderful family, a successful career or a successful relationship.  For many, happiness is hard to hold on to like a grain of sand that slips through your hands or a bubble that bursts once you touch it.

So, what is happiness?  As Merriam Webster dictionary defines it, happiness is a state of well-being and contentment.  Since the feeling of contentment is different for everybody, it means that the person itself defines happiness; in this case, YOU.

What is happiness for you?  What will make you feel and say that you are happy?

Here are some tips that may help you find the happiness you are looking for:

1. Know yourself.  Since only you can define happiness, the first step you need to do before you search for it is to know yourself.  Knowing yourself will lead you half way to your mission.
2. Your happiness depends on you.  Happiness does not dependent on other people, things or places.  People, things or places are beyond your control and depending on them will eventually make you end up being disappointed in the end.

Here’s an example:  When your happiness depends on a particular person, does it mean that when that person goes away, your happiness goes away with them?  If your answer is YES, then you’ll end up being sad because we cannot hold on to a person forever.  So what do you do?  Take your perspective to the next level.  Happiness does not only depend on the physical presence of the person.  It is the feeling that you have deep within you that nobody can take away.  It is the love that binds you together that makes you happy.  If you hold on to this feeling and accept that a person’s life is not forever, then you will still be happy even if that person leaves.  That is happiness.

1. Be positive.  There are always two sides to the coin.  If there are disappointments, downsides and negativity, there are positive things to it, for sure.  Just like water in the glass.  If you always see that your glass is half empty, then you only see what you don’t have.  But if you see that your glass is half full, your perspective changes into looking at what you have rather than what you lack.  Happiness is being able to accept and being thankful for what you have.

Happiness is how you view life

We can therefore conclude that happiness is how you view life.  If you are unhappy, it may only mean that you need to change perspectives.  Finding your happiness is a perfect gift that you can give yourself.  It is very wonderful to be happy.  Everybody deserves to be happy.  In the end, it is always good to know that happiness is not really hard to find.  You only need to look deep within you because it is like a ray of light waiting to explode. The journey toward oneself may take a while, but it is always worth it.  Only then can you say that happiness is not as elusive as most people think.